This one is especially important for women if you want to understand how to stimulate tantric energy in your partner.
In this practice, you are the active one and you stimulate your partner's tantric energy through lingam massage (massaging his sex).
I can't give you the exact graphic details of the movements you do with your hands because a short video would be more effective.
What I can tell you is that you want to practice this in a very gentle way at first.
The goal is NOT to bring him to ejaculation.
The goal is to build up sexual energy in him and bring him close to the orgasmic point without crossing the threshold.
We won't step into energy orgasm at this stage because it is not needed for this practice.
If you massage his lingam and he doesn't lose semen, he will feel totally refreshed and energized after this practice.
You focus 100% on him + guide him to stay totally passive.
Put some massage oil on your hands.
You can chose a sensual massage brand but any oil will actually work.
After that, you can sit crossed legged next to him on his side and let him lay on his back.
You can as well fold one leg crossed leg like and bring your other leg over his body.
This might give you greater stability.
You can get aroused of course, but the goal here is to stay focused on him.
Focus 100% of your attention on what you are doing with your hands.
Don't forget to breathe and watch your whole body posture. You can play with this as well.
Start with very gentle touch. You use close to no pressure in the beginning.
Simply let your finger slide on his lingam without grabbing it yet.
Ideally, a lingam massage could go on for 15 min.
You can as well stretch the practice to 30 min once you both want to dive deeper in it.
This is only a guide line. You are free of course to play with a session's length, shorten it or stretch it to hours of playful practice at will.
It is usually better to have a few short lingam massages spread during the week rather than just one longer session.
Now, imagine that you are dancing with your hands.
You improvise moves while being very aware of what you do.
Let him relax while you take full charge of what you do.
This is not a complicate practice that requires some fancy technique with your hands.
Simply following your instincts will guide you to the exact pleasure moves.
Ask him for feed back a few times in the beginning if you are not sure:
"Does it feel good when I do this?"
"What do you prefer, this move or that one?"
" Does that feel good or does that hurt?"
Keep it ideally to only a few questions max in a session otherwise, you'll start appearing to insecure about what you do and it will be difficult for him to relax and trust you.
Remember that you are in charge for that session. You are leading it, not him.
Remember that a man's balls can be very sensitive to pressure.
Start with very gentle moves always and if you ad rhythm and pressure keep an eye on his reaction.
Even if he doesn't get an erection at first, you can keep massage him, gently with a couple of fingers to wake up his desire.
No pressure! No question mark!
This is not a performance and there is nothing he must do.
Once you have been sliding on his lingam with the end of your fingers for a few minutes, start adding slightly more pressure and let more fingers or even your full palm participate in this dance.
Feel these delightful moves in your body as well.
Feel this energy dancing and waking up in your whole being, not just your hands.
If he wants to move, grab you to have intercourse with you, it's always possible to shift the practice but I encourage you to stick to the lingam massage practice for 15 min at least.
Because you can go deeper in the way you stimulate pleasure in him.
Agree to this before you start.
Ask him to let you lead this part of the tantric play.
Sometimes, guys will feel uncomfortable with being passive.
They feel the urge to reciprocate.
Let him know that you will give him space to give back to you either after this session or the following day for a yony massage this time.
Let him know that it's ok and that you immensely enjoy doing this.
Compliment him for what you see and experience:
- The beauty of his lingam
- The energy you feel vibrating in him
- How these waves of pleasure transform his whole being
- How much pleasure you get from doing this.
- The color and shape of his lingam
If he gives you feed back and has some requests, you can slightly shift your massaging style.
Ideally though, it is better for him to give you less hints while you do it and let you find your own way.
Otherwise, you get the feeling that he is trying to control your moves and this limits your creativity.
There is an exception though: it is if you hurt him or touch him in ways that feel uncomfortable to him.
Then of course, it is a good idea for him to say something.
The best time for feed back is after your lingam massage session.
You can take a moment an hour later or the following day to debrief on how you and him experienced it.
Focus on the positives, the things you both really enjoyed (rather than spending too much time on negative comments).
The best way to reinforce positive behaviors is to praize what you both did right and suggest some points where you both can still gain skills.
The information he gives you is super precious and helps you reorient your massaging style.
After a few sessions, you can quickly become a master at this!
You are able to play with his energies and desire and get him to experience absolute blissful states.
During the session itself, you can ad rhythm and speed to your moves.
There is an unlimited range for possible variations in the way you use your hands.
You can for instance:
- Use only one hand.
- Use one hand on his lingam and position the other at the very root of his lingam (between the balls and the anus)
- Keep your palm flat on the lingam and slide over the lingam's full length.
- Close your hand and fingers around his lingam and massage him up and down.
- Same technique but massage him by turning your hand around his lingam.
- Hold his lingam between your thumb and index and massage is lingam length wise over only 1/2 inch rather his lingam's full length. You do that close to his top which is a very sensitive area.
- Hold his lingam between the palms of your two hands.
- Massage his lingam's full length while holding the previous position.
- Twist your arm and hold his lingam with your full hand while your pinky finger is the one closer to his lingam's top.
- With this previous position, once you reach his top, slide down his lingam again but this time shift your hand position so that your thumb is this time the one closer to his lingam's top.
(I know that a vid is worth a thousand words, so I might post a short video on lingam massage techniques soon if it feels appropriate)
You see that you have dozens of variations and techniques you can explore.
Enjoy and have fun with it.
There is no rush.
Remember the two key ingreadients of this lingam massage session:
- Your tantric partner won't lose semen.
- Your attention is totally focused on him. You both know and agree to that.
I encourage you to lay still next to each other for a few minutes after a lingam massage session.
This will give space for these energies to sink in.
Lay next to each other without touching your bodies, simply side by side and observe the impact of this lingam massage session.
This tantric sex technique is a powerful transformation tool!
If you want to engage in further tantric sex play after your session, you can of course.
Be careful with the oils that you used though, they might not be suitable for your yoni.
If you are not sure, you can wash him lingam at the end and use another type of lubricant for intercourse.
Check the specification of the products you use. Massage oil directly in your yoni could create some hiritation or burning sensation.
You notice that in this session, the male is passive, the female active.
In your next session (same day or days later), you can alternate roles and let him give you a yoni massage this time.
In another article, I will describe powerful yoni massage techniques.
This lingam massage is such a powerful technique that can totally establish complicity in your relationship.
If you are a woman, I fully encourgae you to master that art.
You can't imagine how poweful this simple technique is for creating sexual attrction and play between you and your partner.
Especially if you feel you need something to spice up or reawaken your sex life, this is definitely one card to ad to your skills.
You can practice a lingam massage for instance even if he feels too tired for sex.
In this position he can totally relax and let you take care of him.
It is REALLY and incredible way to create sexual attraction between you and your partner.
More on this technique in another article.
To your tantra!